What is the easiest way to start?
Keep it simple:
Pick a meeting time.
Arrive 5–10 minutes early.
Walk in and sit down.
Listen.
After the meeting, ask one person for help or a meeting schedule.
Come back again.
One meeting may not answer every question. But it can be the start of something better.
Should I arrive early? Yes
Arriving 5–10 minutes early can make things easier.
It gives you time to park, find the room, get coffee, and sit down before the meeting starts.
But if you are running late, don't worry. You can still come in quietly and take a seat.
You Can Just Listen? Yes
At your first meeting, it is perfectly okay to just listen.
You do not have to speak. You do not have to introduce yourself if you are not ready. You do not have to tell your story. Many people come to their first meeting, sit quietly, and listen to others share their experience with drinking, recovery, and life.
Listening is enough.
You Do Not Have to Speak? No
If someone asks whether there are any newcomers, you may raise your hand if you want to, but you are not required to.
Some people are comfortable saying, “My name is ___, and this is my first meeting.”
Others prefer to stay quiet. Either is okay.
Al-Anon is not about pressure.
It is about help, hope, and one alcoholic helping another.
You Do Not Have to Sign Anything? No
You do not need an appointment to attend an Al-Anon meeting at Saddleback Club.
Just check the meeting schedule, choose a meeting time, and come in. If you arrive early, you can usually find someone who can help point you in the right direction.
Meetings Are Free? Yes
Al-Anon meetings are free to attend.
During many meetings, a basket may be passed for voluntary contributions. This helps pay for rent, coffee, supplies, and other meeting expenses. Contributing is optional, however is encouraged. Newcomers or Anybody is welcome whether they contribute or not.
Which Room Do I Go To?
Some meetings are held in different rooms depending on the size and format of the meeting.
When you arrive, check the posted schedule or ask someone:
“Hi, I’m looking for the Al-Anon meeting.”
That is enough. Someone will help you find the right room.
You do not need to know the layout ahead of time.
What If I Am Nervous?
Most people are nervous before their first Al-Anon meeting.
You may be thinking:
What if I see someone I know?
What if people judge me?
What if I do not belong?
What if my problem is not bad enough?
What if my problem is too bad?
These fears are common. Many people in the room felt the same way before their first meeting.
You are not expected to be perfect. You are not expected to have answers.
You only need to show up.
Are people friendly? Yes
This is common thought prior to attending Al-Anon meetings. People attending are their to get better. Part of my recovery, is helping you recover. Somebody will always say hello, and offer guidance.
Can Family Members Attend? Yes
Family members and friends may attend open Al-Anon meetings.
If a family member is looking for help for themselves, Al-Anon may also be helpful. Al-Anon is for families and friends affected by someone else’s drinking.
What Is an O bservers Meeting?
An observer meeting is available to anyone interested in Al-Anon or finding ways to recovery from alcoholism.
This may include:
People who think they may have a drinking problem
Family members
Friends
Students
Professionals
Anyone who wants to learn more about Al-Anon
All meetings are often a good choice for someone attending for the first time, especially if they want to bring a supportive family member or friend.
Are Attendance Cards Signed? Yes
Typically Al-Anon visitors do not have attendance cards. However attendance cards are signed at every meeting. Bring your own, of download one here.
Can I go to more than one meeting? Yes
You can attend more than one meeting.
Many people go to several meetings when they are new. Some attend daily, especially in the beginning.
You are welcome to come back as often as needed.
What Happens During an Al-Anon Meeting?
Every meeting is a little different, but many Al-Anon meetings follow a simple format:
Typical meetings are 1 hours long.
The meeting opens with a reading or welcome.
A topic may be introduced.
People may share their experience.
You may listen quietly, or share if you want to.
You will have a few laughs.
You may see a tear, or hear of a struggle.
See and hear what hope & recovery can offer you.
You will experience, that you are not alone.
A basket is passed for voluntary contributions.
The meeting closes, often with a prayer or short reading.
You do not need to understand everything the first time. Just listening is a good start.
What Happens After the Meeting?
After the meeting, some people stay to talk, ask questions, or introduce themselves.
You may choose to leave right away, or you may stay and speak with someone. If you are new, it can help to tell one person:
“This is my first meeting.”
Most Al-Anon members remember their first meeting and are willing to help.
You may be offered a phone number, a meeting schedule, or a suggestion to come back tomorrow / again. You can take what is helpful and leave the rest.
Do I Have to Say I Am involved / associated to an Alcoholic? No
You do not have to label yourself before you are ready.
Many people come to Al-Anon because they are unsure. They may know somebody's drinking is causing problems, but they may not know what to call it. That is okay.
You are welcome to attend, listen, and decide for yourself whether Al-Anon may help you.
At the beginning of the meeting, first 10 mins. Typically we say: Are there any Newcomers / First time attendees ? please state your first name so we can get to know you.
Typically response could be:
Say nothing, if you are unsure.
(Name), this is my first meeting.
My name is (name), I am a visitor.
My name is (name), I am here to get some information.
Here is a simple test that might help you decide
What If I Drank Today?
You are still welcome.
If you are in medical danger, experiencing withdrawal symptoms, or feel unsafe, seek medical help immediately or call 911.
But if you are simply scared, tired, ashamed, or unsure what to do next, coming to a meeting can be a good first step.
What Should I Bring?
You do not need to bring anything.
Helpful but optional items:
Yourself
A notebook
A pen
An open mind
A willingness to listen
That is enough.
A Simple First-Meeting Plan
If you are nervous, keep it simple:
Pick a meeting time.
Arrive 5–10 minutes early.
Walk in and sit down.
Listen.
After the meeting, ask one person for help or a meeting schedule.
Come back again.
One meeting may not answer every question. But it can be the start of something better.
